Go away from my window.

Feelings. Why must we have them? I hate them sometimes. I like them sometimes. Right now I hate them.

I had a dream two nights ago that was a little frightening. Do you ever have dreams where someone or something bad is after you and you suddenly cannot talk? As hard as you try to call for help or say anything you just can't get anything out. Like your throat stops working. I had another one of those dreams last night, but i was about to take a bath and suddenly heard someone say my name quietly, then all of a sudden this shadow jumped out at me and said my name again and I tried to say "Jesus Christ" over and over but could not get it out.

On a lighter note...the band I am in played a show on Saturday and Sunday night. Saturday's show was awesome! It was at the neighbor's house of my nanny family. They had a huge end of Summer luau and there were a ton of people there and they loved us! It was our first paying gig. Hopefully not our last. Then, Sunday we played at the Underground Music Cafe. It was their 2 year anniversary and their last one ever. It was sad they're done cause that's pretty much the only place we play since Segue closed. Now we have nothing. Nowhere. Sunday's show wasn't as amazing cause we were all pretty tired and somewhat lethargic. Plus we were nervous for some strange reason. I attributed it all to the fact that we did not pray before we played.
I need more prayer in my life. Lots more.

I am trying to be like those confident women. You know the ones who you never hear utter a word about men. They always talk about God, their families, or work. Just life in general, but they never include the topic of "men". I am going to try to eliminate "men" from my vocabulary. I want to be one of those confident women. Ones who don't care so much how others, especially men, perceive them.

I'm finding myself wanting to become inredibly passionate about Christ, but lacking the motivation to do so.